San Juan Mountains

San Juan Mountains
San Juan Mountains: Grenadier Range

Friday, June 10, 2016

Bernie Is Dead, Long Live The Queen

So the Democrats have made their choice and it will be Hillary vs The Donald.  It would be far more interesting if the contest could be decided inside a cage but I suspect that most folks will want to have some sort of election process prior to crowning our next King or Queen.  I went on record quite some time ago with my prediction that Hillary would become the first Queen of the Socialist Democracy of Amerika and I am sticking with my story.  I also predicted that Bush III would be running against her.  That prediction illustrates why I am not a stock broker.  My ability to foresee future events is nonexistent.
Now that Bernie is kaput both sides are clamoring for his supporters to come and join them.  If we lived in a truly rational world, which we clearly do not, we would all recognize that combining Bernie supporters with either Hillary or Donald is like attempting to force oil and water to mix.  It just ain't gonna happen.  Nevertheless I am looking forward to this election cycle more than any I can recall from recent times.  I think it is going to be outrageous.  I think it is going to give me plenty of fodder for this blog.  I can't wait to see how things pan out.
As I was walking through the local grocery store this morning, looking for some fresh blueberries to consume, I overheard a stocker in the produce section telling a fellow patron that he was a disappointed Bernie supporter.  His grief and sorrow, plus a significant dose of sour grapes at "the system" which had just rejected his personal diety, got me to thinking.  In fact, as I was driving home I came up with a list of questions I would like to ask of anyone and everyone who supported Bernie for next King of the SDA.  Without further ado, and in the hope some stray Bernie supporter might read this post and actually respond to my questions, I give you my dozen questions for a Bernie supporter:
  1. Who forced you to go to college against your will?
  2. Who forced you to take out student loans against your will?
  3. Why have you not brought either civil or criminal charges against the people who forced you to go to college or take out student loans against your will?
  4. How long have you been living in your parent's basement?
  5. How long do you plan to continue living in your parent's basement?
  6. Is it morally correct for me to steal your property by violence?
  7. If some legislature made a law proclaiming it to be morally right for me to steal your property by violence does that make it morally right for me to do so?
  8. If you answered "Yes" to the last question, please confirm that you believe in the principle that morality is determined by career politicians who are elected by majority vote.  Please confirm that you believe something can be morally good one day and morally evil the next.  Once you have confirmed that principle I have another question for you.  What if the career politicians who make the law declared biblical law to be the law of land, would that make biblical law morally right?  In other words, the state would execute juvenile delinquents, homosexuals, transvestites and adulterers for their heinous sins and rejection of God's perfect moral law.  After you answer "No" to that question please admit that you are a hypocrite.  If you answered "No" to the very first question, please proceed to the next question.  
  9. Since you have already admitted that a state legislature cannot make a law making it legal to steal the property of another person by violence, please explain why you are not a hypocrite for believing that the state should take some of my money by force and threat of imprisonment for non-compliance and give it to you to pay for your college tuition bills.  While you are working on that one you might also want to explain why it is morally right for the top 49% of the income population to pay for 98.5% of the entire federal budget.  
  10. Please explain how, if the "system" (whatever that is, you seem to know since you use the word all the time) is "rigged," your hero managed to advance as far as he did.
  11. Please explain how it is that money and those who hold it are evil yet you want the government to take most of the money held by evil people and give it to you.  How do you avoid becoming evil, and thus subject to expropriation of your money, once you receive the inherently evil money?
  12. How long have you been missing your brain?  Oh, that's right, I will answer this question for you. You don't miss it!
In the interest of fair play I also have a dozen questions for Hillary supporters.  Once again, if you find yourself a supporter of the person I believe will be our next Queen, please respond to any or all of these twelve questions:
  1. Why do you consider yourself to be an intelligent and informed voter and yet make the decision to vote for Hillary simply because you have two X chromosomes?  (Note to intelligent and informed voters:  having "two X chromosomes" means you are a woman.  So do you think I am condescending for writing this parenthetical comment?  Do you even know what that means?)
  2. If you are voting for Hillary simply because she is a female, what will you do with your vote if Hillary decides to self-identify as a man prior to the election in November? 
  3. If Hillary identifies as a man and remains married to Bill, does that make her a homosexual and thus subject to privileged status in the eyes of the government?  Is that privileged status enough to win her the Crown?  Can she sue somebody for discrimination if she does not win?
  4. Are you going to read Gary Byrne's tell-all book about his life and times as the secret service agent posted outside the oval office during Bill's kingship?  
  5. Have you already made up your mind that Byrne is a vicious liar out to enrich and aggrandize himself, thus allowing you to discount and ignore everything he writes about the tyrannical and immoral Hillary Clinton?  
  6. Please explain, in your own words, how health care premiums are actually a tax and thus subject to federal regulation.  Feel free to refer to the Constitution of the United States in defense of your position. 
  7. How many pants suits do you own and how often do you wear them?
  8. Would you rather listen to a speech by Hillary or camp out next to an operating 747?
  9. Do you consider crying in public a sign of strength or weakness?  Please explain your answer. Yes, the Mad Welshman is both sexist and misogynist.  Does that bother you?  Why?  You have already confessed to being misandrist if you answered Question # 1 in the affirmative.
  10. If Hillary is the next Queen does that make Bill the first "First Man?"  Follow up question:  If Bill is the first First Man does that give him the right to have sex with staffers in the oval office, just like the good old days?
  11. At what point does a particular minimum wage become detrimental for economic growth?  If raising the minimum wage never becomes detrimental for economic growth why should it not be raised to $100,000 per hour, thus making everyone rich beyond their wildest dreams as all of those wages are spent back into the economy, causing it to grow beyond belief?
  12. How many hairstylists should Hillary have on staff, how many hours should they work and how much taxpayer money should they be paid if she becomes the first Queen of the SDA?
I don't expect any answers to any of these questions because the questions themselves gloriously expose the weakness of all the positions held by both Bernie and Hillary supporters.  Admit it, I am right and you are wrong.  Admit it, I win and you lose.  Admit it, you are an envy-filled lover of civil government out for a free ride at taxpayer (me) expense and I simply love freedom.   You are thieves, each and everyone one of you.  Repent before it is too late to do so. 

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